a blog I wrote November 2008 after meeting my childhood idols November 19 2008 in Calgary Alberta

ok many of you have been waiting very patiently for this blog but when something so big and wonderful happens it is often very hard to figure out the right words to use to describe it. You know in the weeks leading up to our trip to calgary I dreamt about things like kissing Donnie and hanging out with the band on the bus but who knew that dreams really do come true!Ok let me start from the day of the show now. Tabitha and I woke up to my cell phone alarm which was set to my ring tone Full Service of course! We got up, had coffee and began to get ready. when we were looking as hot as we thought possible and let me tell you we were damn hot! Tabitha began video recording us as we went through our check list of what to take for the day. I was super excited and said I got my mind right donnie and see these lips I got my lips right too and they are coming for you! The excitment in our room was electric as we got our coats on and headed down to take the train to the saddle dome. We were to meet some other gals from our JordanGate thread on the forum for 11am. We got there first and waited and then this beautiful girl says hey you are beth and there was Holly! Ami and Jess had some directional issues and got there later but Tab, holly and I had lunch in our most excellent home made shirts! After the others arrived we thought we might go take a peek at the saddle dome to see if the busses were there. As we approached I heard Tabitha gasp! There were all the busses all lined up! We stood and watched the dancers come to and from the bus to the stadium. A brown van pulled in and a blond woman with a baby got out and I said maybe that is joes wife. No sooner did I say that then around the front of the van comes Joey walking behind with the baby car seat. No one yelled just then out of respect for his wife and son but when he came back out Holly yelled HI JOE and he smiled and waved. I got to back it up a little here to say that I had forgotten to bring any mittens with me but I did bring extra socks in case my feet got cold so I had put them on my freezing hands. It was not until after joe went in that I realized I waved at Joe with socks on my hands lol. Any way Jordan came out of his bus next and that time I yelled JORDAN and he waved and yelled ou hi and I said COME OVER! He rubbed his hands together and said it was too cold. He was very nice though! Jon came out of the bus to have a smoke but being the shy guy that he is he was not out long and stayed hidden as much as he could. At this point I had to go to the washroom so we walked over to the building with the washroom when I get a text from amy saying come now. we started to head back when she texted me DONNIE AND DANNY!. I did not know I could run as fast as I did it was like I had a fire at my butt lol. I got there and they were gone I was so sad but not even 3 min later donnie and danny came out again. We yelled DONNIE!! He turned around and SPRINTED up the snowy hill to the fence where we were. He held my hand through the fence and said to all of us how long have you been out here? We told him a long time, it had been a couple hours at least. He said "It's fucking cold out here" and then let go of my hand and started counting us. Then quietly told us only the ones he counted and no more but that he was going to go get his assistant to bring us around to bring us onto his tour bus!! I thought I would die. so off he went and we waited and waited and nothing. Some people were saying oh he is not coming back for us but Ami and I kept saying Our man don't lie if he says he is coming for us he will. So all of a sudden he comes back out and sees us there and throws his hands up in the air and said "My assistant didn't come for you yet????? hold on 1 second"So Johnny comes to the fence to give us some instructions like don't rush any of the other guys if they come around you are donnies guests so respect the other guys. Only take pictures when you are told that it is ok and all that sort of thing and off we go in a big group all the while being recorded for nktv as we walk up the lot to the bus!Tab was in front of me the first to get on the bus I was second. Wow! I am on the baby daddy bus! It is warm and smells so good almost a mix between floral air freshner and cinnimon. Not sure if it was insence or a glade plug in but it was fantastic! Donnie was in the back bedroom on a business call for the first little while and we spoke to Johnny and he gave and offered us so many things like chips, water, pop, chocolate bars, kashi basically anything that you can think of. Very kind. There was a big tv built into the wall and the infamous stripper pole lol. then all of a sudden we hear the bedroom door click and Donnie's voice say AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!! Anyway there was a lot of chit chat and a few pictures oh and on his way to the back for the face time pic he lost his footing with all of us in there and landed ON MY LAP!!!! Ok so I kinda pulled him a little too but it was so crowded he would not have realized that I pulled him down onto my lap ha ha ha ha!! Then it was time for us all to go in for 5*!I am going to skip over all the snacks and drinks and get right to my meet and greet! I walked in and was headed towards my Donnie and well I was so nervous and excited I was not really looking at anyones faces. I saw Jordan speaking to another girl and this guy stepped out in front of me. I was going to walk around so he sort of hesitated all of a sudden I realized and said out loud, OH! Joe!! give me a hug and as I hugged him I said I love you. That is what I said to all of them lol. Next I made my way to my man donnie! I was the only donnie girl in our group so I spent the majority of our time in his arms lol. I kinda absently recapped everything to him...I cam all the way from toronto....I know baby HUG I was on your bus.....I know girl HUG I love you can I have a kiss? He pulls back with me still in his arms and I turn my cheek and wait. No kiss? I turn my face to him and he has this drop dead sexy expression on his face almost a smirk and then it happens! He plants his soft lips right on mine! it was not a tight puckered kiss but just perfect! then we had 2 photos taken and they wanted us out so I had to rush my hugs to get danny jon and jordan in. Danny's hug was a little stiff but he was still nice and smiled. Then I said OH JON and turned he had his arms open for me and I just threw my arms around him told him I loved him and he said thanks. Then I had to get one from jordan but I did not hear what he said back to me because they kept telling us to get out for the next group to go in. When the groups were done Donnie stuck around to do a bunch of autographs and he signed the back of my pass. Then we had to collect our cell phones and cameras and get to our seats.I could not believe it. As we walked the floor to the 6th row (which was really 3rd) Tabitha and commented that we were now the girls we hate for having the best seats!!! The show was amazing and I cried between the meet and greet and the show I just could not fathum what was going on. Stuff like this never happens to me. The fact that no matter how silly other people may think I have been for dreaming about the new kids on the block or spending what they think to be too much money on this it really was a 20 year dream come true for me that no words or money will ever come close to how much it meant to me! I shared it with a wonderful long time friend and made new life long friends along the way and got to have face time with my beatles, my first loves, the ones I have been loving since I was 13 years old! This is something I will never ever forget and I will be pinching myself because I still have trouble believing that it happened!

i have resolved to do a few things this year. Not new years resolutions but life changes
one being to learn how to cook. This will promote a healthier life style for one and save money on eating out. So i gathered some receipes and and bought spices and things i had never heard of before and well who knew that grated ginger root did not come already grated?? I was looking for it at the bulk barn. needless to say i felt like a tool when i was told you have to buy the root and grate it yourself with a cheese grater thingy! Here is the receipe I tried out today and was pretty good at making if i do say so myself!

Thai-Riffic Basil Stir Fry

• prepared beef broth 1/4 cup
• lime juice 2 tbsp.
• brown sugar, packed 2 tbsp.
• soy sauce 1 tbsp.
• corn starch 2 tsp.
• cooking oil 1 tbsp.
• beef top sirloin steak, cut into thin, short strips 1 lb.
• garlic clove, minced 1
• dried crushed chilies 1 tsp.
• sliced onion 1 cup
• sliced red pepper 1 cup
• chopped fresh basil 1/4 cup
• chopped dry roasted peanuts (optional) 1/4 cup

Heat large frying pan or wok on medium-high until very hot. Meanwhile, combine first 5 ingredients in a small cup. set aside.

Add cooking oil to frying pan. add next 3 ingredients. Stir fry for about 2 to 4 minutes until beef reaches resired doneness. Transfer to plate. cover to keep warm.

Add onion and red pepper to same frying pan. Stir fry for about 2 minutes until tender-crisp. Add beef mixture. Stir cornstarch mixture. Add to beef mixture. Heat and stir for about 1 minute until boiling and thickened.

Add basil. Stir. Sprinkle peanuts over top. Makes about 2 1/2 cups.

Serves 4.

I am exhausted...

oh my word I just watched the movie called seven pounds starring will smith. wow. it left me speachless really and feeling very overwhelmed and a bit sad. fantastic movie though I am not going to spoil anything for anyone but I smell an oscar or two for this one!

I say it over and over again that i am horrible at keeping up with my blog. in the day and age of facebook and myspace and all the other pages we visit obsessivley it can be difficult to remember to actually blog. Christmas 2008 has come and gone and I really am blessed! I am thankful for the very well thought out gifts I recieved from a crock pot to a pink tool kit and a photo magazine subscription to a freeset bag. www.stopthetraffik.org check it out such an amazing cause! i wanted to wish you all love and happiness and a SAFE new year. don't make resolutions just be the best you that you can be! Dont drink and drive!

Much love, and more to come in 2009 - I promise!

Cross my heart and hope to die...

but PLEASE no more needles in my eye!!!!

I had my 4th treatment yesterday of Avastin.

It is injected right into my eye.

While it was true, it was not as bad this time around as it was last time (horrible) it still leaves very little to be desired.

Now I wait

wait

wait

wait

6 weeks to wait

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.

.

.

.

It seems my life as a pin cushion involves a lot of wait and see.

it is frustrating

it is tiring

it makes me want to give up

but I cannot even THINK that far in the future of this without panicing a little

so I wait

I am so excited

Jason Mraz is performing again in Toronto

I did not go last time because well most of my friends were like

"Jason who??"

PFFFT

He is AMAZING!!!!!!

There is a friend at work who I found

with a mutual love of all things Mraz!!

We are trying to score some tickets.

I really should not spend my money on so many different concert tickets but then again i did nothing all summer but work. Why not see a few shows!

I'll be seeing New Kids on the Block twice in September lol and then Jason's show is October at Massy hall!

weeeeeeeeeeee - I feel delighted